Grey Squirrel's Page of Silliness

They eat only the void,
such as the form of corpses;
they get drunk on empty words
and all the meaningless expressions we utter.

Rene Daumal

Majority of Office Workers
Wish They Were Squirrels

Fifty-three percent of office workers interviewed in a recent survey
said that if they could be born again they would prefer to be squirrels,
a newspaper reported on Sunday.

The study was carried out by a group of students of sociology.

The study found that office workers who take their lunch breaks outdoors
or in local parks are the most affected. After being cooped up in a cubicle for hours
and dealing with bosses with unrealistic expectations, an office worker can find him
or herself sitting on a park bench, watching the carefree antics of local squirrels
and wondering, "Wouldn't it be great if . . . "

A worker in Indianapolis, IN has spent his breaks over the last 3 weeks
building a miniature park on top of his file cabinet,
complete with miniature park benches, elderly figurines,
trees and tree condos.
"When it gets to be too much," he said,
"I simply picture myself running through the park
or scampering up a tree to my own private sanctuary."
Most people go to less extremes and the most common
is to stash snacks around the office in secret
hiding places (just in case).

Many of the workers interviewed said they would consider
a species change operation once
the technology has been improved upon.
A Kentucky Fox squirrel, who recently had a
species change operation to become a human office worker,
finds life so difficult she has been trying to reverse the operation.
Species change operations are legal in most countries
but the procedure is still considered experimental and
potentially dangerous and there are no provisions for
would-be species-changers to test out their new identity first.

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All squirrel animation and photo alterations by b.kee(c)1999

Original photo (c) Dan Starr


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