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but you cannot accept love
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Kentucky Raises Idea Of Urban Squirrel Tax



Reports are circulating that officials in Kentucky
are discussing a potential $1-per-squirrel daily fee
on city parks as a way to help raise money to fight
Stockton Dupres' rebel squirrel army.

With a frightening budget deficit, officials are grasping
at straws trying to find a way to keep their towns and
forests from falling to the rebels.

Such a fee would require city parks to shell out $365.00
per squirrel each year. If it is passed, the parks will have
to start charging an entrance fee. "People who feed the
squirrels would be charged a higher admission fee," admitted
one unidentified lawmaker. "Since they are ultimately
contributing to the problem."

Hunters are not safe and often turn up missing if they stray
from their groups. A slave-labor camp discovered in 2002
resulted in the liberation of hundreds of captured
squirrel hunters, all scheduled to be dispersed throughout
the state to work in underground nut mines.

It is thought that the squirrels dabble in cigarette
smuggling to finance their Campaigns.

To be continued...

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All squirrel animation and photo alterations by b.kee(c)1999
Original squirrel photo (C)Gregg Elovich
Most Music on this site from unknown sources

©1997greysquirrel@greysquirrel.net



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